"Slogging My Way Through The Slough of Despond" or "Hair Today; Gone Tomorrow," a melodrama in 3 acts

By now, after all my posts about it, I'm sure you all know that I've joined St. Baldricks. On April 16th I am shaving my head in solidarity with children who lose their hair during cancer treatment. My hair will be donated to Locks of Love in order to make a wig for one of these sweet kiddos, but more importantly, I will be raising funds for cancer research. Because St. Baldricks is purely volunteer run, 100% of the donations I receive will go directly toward research, and that is very exciting to me.

So, you all know WHAT I'm doing. The question I keep getting is WHY? I mean, sure, it's a great idea, noble cause and all that, but the hair bit seems a bit excessive, right? It has even been suggested that I cut my hair short, still donate the length of it, and retain enough for a cute bob. In the future I may actually do that, but for this time, my first time, I have to go all the way.

I wish I could say my intentions were completely altruistic, but to be completely honest, I am seeking to heal myself just as much as I wish to play a role in the healing of others. I am rounding the bend on the longest and darkest year of my life, having fought crippling anxiety, with the help of therapy and medication and a handful of friends who had been there before. I have been in survival mode for a long time now. Although not a bad thing in itself, it is by definition selfish, and I’m getting really tired of it. I am finally to a point in my healing process where I feel like the next step is to shake off the shackles of fear and despair that have held me down. I need to do something daring, something that scares me, and by so doing lend courage to those who really need it.